On The Threshold Of Adulthood

It’s my last day as a seventeen year old. It’s my last day as a “child”. Oh, all these thoughts make me feel so anxious. Standing on the threshold of adulthood, I never thought I would feel this way. A week ago, I was filled with excitement and now after raving and ranting about my big day, I’m not too sure if I’m all that excited any longer.

Wow, eighteen years of my life have gone by just like that. In these years, I made some amazing friends, came across some fantastic acquaintances and even met a couple of people who weren’t exactly meant for me. But the only ones who were with me and still are with are my family. They were my dad, mum and my brother. Yes, father isn’t here with my physically but that doesn’t take away his presence in my life in his own special way. My brother, the chap came along exactly ten years later. As much as we fight, I can’t stop myself from loving him. And finally that one lady, the lady who carried me in her womb for nine months, took all the pain in the world to bring me to life, who was with me when my father was out at sea, my mother. They are reason for my existence, and I may not be able to express it to them but they define me.

It’s the last day when I can be as irresponsible as I like and claim to be a child. What happens tomorrow? I’m not too sure. At this point there’s just one song that plays on my mind. Spears managed to capture it all in just one line, “Not a girl, not yet a woman.” Age doesn’t quite matter, not until we reach a certain point in life of course. Even then, the mind thinks along those lines.

Above all, I feel blessed to have made it this far. I’ve lost friends my age and always wondered why. Every new day is a blessing indeed and every new year is a greater blessing. Having reached this far, I’m still not too sure what I want. I hope that’s okay. Now on I can do a lot more than before, and it would be considered legal too. That gives me a high, but then I don’t want to miss out on the protection. That felt so much more special. We can be young just once, but I hope the ability to be immature can stay on. There was a point when I hated being told how I was still a young child. But now, being told I’m old enough to fend for myself doesn’t seem that good.

A New Beginning. A New Journey.
Every year, my birthday excites me and then it bites me reminding me about getting older. But then when I think about birthdays, I feel good. It’s not all about the celebration alone but more about the fact that more the birthdays I have, the longer I live.

So yep, bring on adulthood! After experiencing this part I want to know what that feels like.