Falling in love is a lot like riding a bike for the first time. It is scary but you never really forget it. The first time you fall in love, you only see the best. You see the best in all that happens, you see the best in the other person. But then it all turns around when the sweet nothings are not so sweet after all. You come face to face with reality. Your heart is broken and you’re left by yourself. You realise that happy-ever-afters are only in fairytales. That first love being your only love is only in books and movies and not in real life. But eventually you move on. You come to understand that love could knock on your door again. And it does.
Falling in love for the second time is not close to the first time. The first time is a magical gift you can never get back. And eventually you realise that that’s okay. You can never reclaim a special experience and you’d rather not. The second time you fall in love is far more real anyway. The second time brings with it deep emotion and involves some ecstatic moments. You don’t trust blindly and you certainly don’t assume the best. You’re more careful this time. Although you value this love a lot more. You realise its worth. It’s not a picture perfect memory that you want to create any more, rather a true long lasting one instead.
This time round it isn’t just an infatuation, it isn’t just blind faith. The second time you fall in love, you build on a deeper connection with the person. You understand their flaws and you’re willing to be vulnerable too. You’re not so concerned about being perfect for him, you’re willing to be your comfortable self instead. You can’t love as freely as you did the first time but you are willing to let your guard down and let him into your life. Allow him to know you like no one else did. Maybe, even more than you understand yourself.
The idea of a “first love” being your real love is very cliché. And most of us are obsessed with that idea. You think you can never love again with all your heart. Well the truth is, you do. And you love rather earnestly. You actually “try” in this relationship than depend on fate. You work on your relationship rather than leave it in the hands of time. And so, even in hard times, your love manages to survive the rough waters. Although you face doubts and fears and your relationship hits the rocky paths every now and then, you are happy because it is real. You are happy because this time, it is honest. And you know this because his love is enough to twinkle even through your darkest clouds.
And it is in that happy moment under the starlit sky by his side that you come to realise that maybe it was never about the happy ending. Maybe it is about the story. After all, it’s not the final destination but the journey that counts.
And even if another love story follows, your second love is the best love. It is lasts even if it ends. It makes you happy even on sad days. It makes you believe on the gloomiest days. It makes you stronger on doubtful occasions. It gives you the satisfaction of a real relationship, where you’re willing to love and be loved; where you’re to give it your all and allow someone to do the same.
So love again, ’cause it only gets better. Don’t be afraid, ’cause you could get lucky the second time if not the first. I know I was – second time lucky.