14 July 2020.
This is your 12th birthday in heaven, somewhere over the rainbows.
Just like every birthday since your first one in heaven, I baked you something special to celebrate. Something sweet, to remember your sweet soul by.
Whilst your birthday brings back the memories, I think of you everyday. I think of you in the little moments and the milestones and wonder how things would be different if you were still here. You would have seen Kieran graduate from high school. You would have seen me get married. You would’ve got on with our friends. Maybe, even enjoyed retirement with mum and travelled (maybe) or gone fishing. You would have shared your faith and humour with people you met and always put on a big feast to eat. You would pick up a thriller to read or go for a swim, or play a game of table tennis. You would call us out on our bullshit while also cheering us on every step of the way. You would make the world a better place. But mostly, you would love, like you always have loved. You would silently be present and love.
I wish you were still here. Sitting in your rocking chair, sharing your life lessons. I wish you were here to hold my hand when we got married. I wish you were here with mum, making her laugh. I wish you were you here to see Kieran bloom. I wish here you were here to meet Matt and enjoy each other’s sarcastic humour and company. I wish you were to share your brilliant mind and heart with my in-laws. I wish you were here to enjoy time off on the farm and have a sit down and be looked after for a change. I wish you were still here. But you’re not here and I miss you more than words can say. I miss you always.
I’ve often heard, “only the good die young” and “God only takes the best.” They weren’t wrong. He chose the best, He chose you.
Happy birthday dada! You’re my sunshine on a cloudy day. The heavens must be glad.
Your doll, loving you forever.