Riding solo

Does doing things on your own make you a strange pea? Does that mean you’re lonely?

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The story

We all have a rehearsed set of lines similar to our Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn bios. These are usually simple yet exciting enough, witty but safe. It is the story you know people want to hear even if it is not yours to tell. It is a story of our past achievements, our future aspirations, our talents and outward appearances. It is a story meant for the file.

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Mental health matters

There will always be people telling you they know better. There will always be people finding shame in your struggles and achievements. There will also always be you who matters most. There will always be voices of self doubt. There will always be cheers for self love. On good and bad days, there will always be love for you, from your family, friends and strangers alike.

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Good or bad, time will tell

We are not running out of time. Our journeys will pan out as they must eventually anyway. So it is okay not knowing every once in a while. It’s okay to keep putting your building blocks together, bit by bit. It’s okay to feel confused. It’s okay to feel frustrated. It’s okay to feel everything all at once.

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26

Turning 25 seemed monumental and I suppose it was! I finished a Master’s degree, I found my best friend, I discovered my inner goof, I started putting a home together, I became a puppy-mummy. In so many ways, I truly crossed the threshold of adulthood while meandering through 25. As I turn another year older, there is so much to reflect on, so much to learn from, so much to share, so much to teach—all these lessons and thoughts root themselves in my mind, reminding me of all that I should be thankful for. But everything in between that milestone and the rest of my life seems rather indefinite. I mean, what’s 26 supposed to feel like?

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To grow in grief

When you lose someone you love, you don’t simply grieve their loss. With them, you lose yourself and parts of those around you. With them, you lose friends and family and partners you thought would continually stand by you. With them, you lose light. With them, you lose love. With them, you lose a piece of kindness from your whole. With them, you lose faith in the Almighty. With them, you lose a version of life you were prepared for. With them, you lose a piece of life too.

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Almost 25: Quarter-life lessons

With a week to turning twenty-five, as always, the elation is trailed by contemplation. As I turn a year older (and hopefully wiser), here are some of my quarter-life lessons.

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Note to self: Be thankful for those that let you down

People will disappoint you in life. Friendships you’ve had for years will fall apart. People you’ve looked up to will not always have your interest at heart. Strangers will not always be who they say they are. The loves of your life will change and often, you might even disappoint yourself with life choices and roads less taken. This will happen at home and at work.

Never let anyone walk all over your love or allow them to shake your confidence. Those that matter will find a way to find common ground, as will you.

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Note to self: Seek your light

Let go and seek your light.

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Note to self: Just be as you are

Attractive waistlines and skin tones. Melodious voices and wired brains. Good hair and sun-kissed smiles. Defined gender roles and ideal sexual orientation. What if, in an alternate universe, everything that we’re conditioned to thinking is wrong with us was right?

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