Sometimes self-care is writing or drawing. Sometimes it is fighting for what is right for you. Sometimes it is saying no. It could also be travelling to a new city alone. Sometimes it is doing absolutely nothing. Self-care is also telling yourself it’s okay to make mistakes; it’s okay to not know. Sometimes it is letting people see you for who you are. It is also not being ashamed of being weak. It is also accepting that you are strong.
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When you lose someone you love, you don’t simply grieve their loss. With them, you lose yourself and parts of those around you. With them, you lose friends and family and partners you thought would continually stand by you. With them, you lose light. With them, you lose love. With them, you lose a piece of kindness from your whole. With them, you lose faith in the Almighty. With them, you lose a version of life you were prepared for. With them, you lose a piece of life too.
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Love is a myriad of moments and emotions and stolen smiles. It is text messages and the kisses he leaves on your forehead, it is fears enveloped in laughter and kisses mixed with alcohol. It is holding a new pair of hands and walking in the rain. It is sharing a box of nuggets in the park and studying together by candlelight. It makes you live and helps you forgive. What it isn’t is perfection. In fact, it is anything but. Often, it can be flawed but most other times it is beautiful, just like this moment—covered in light, content, committed, warm, delicious and cuddly.
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I can’t remember the last time it was as easy to feel at home with someone you hadn’t ever met before. In between Pancake Parlour, the Coldplay concert and the 229 patio, I found two of my best friends. It’s one of the best stories to share as far as serendipitous friendships go – from attending concerts as strangers to living together as soul-friends.
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Every person we meet has a role to play in our lives. Some to teach us who we are, and some to teach us who we aren’t. This one is to all those friends whose lives crossed paths with mine. We may not still be friends but you’ve made a difference in mine, and I hope I did the same for you.
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As millennials, we find ourselves at crossroads because we’re told or seem to believe that love is hard and impossible. Sure, it involves compromise and is a work-in-progress. But when you think about the person you share this love with, it is meant to feel and be beautiful. It is the people you share this love with that often makes it bittersweet. If you or they didn’t find to make it last, maybe it wasn’t love? It might have been something good, just not love. So don’t give up on love and don’t give up on yourself.
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People will disappoint you in life. Friendships you’ve had for years will fall apart. People you’ve looked up to will not always have your interest at heart. Strangers will not always be who they say they are. The loves of your life will change and often, you might even disappoint yourself with life choices and roads less taken. This will happen at home and at work.
Never let anyone walk all over your love or allow them to shake your confidence. Those that matter will find a way to find common ground, as will you.
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In a world driven and divided by selfish motives, corporate greed, extremist religious beliefs, radical political ideologies, online bullying, and war, embody the morality you believe in. Your wellness and that of others rest in your hands as much as it does in those with the power to implement change. You and I can make a difference to worlds that are otherwise challenging, conflicting and chaotic. Practice random acts of kindness for friends, your family and strangers. You are a spoke on the wheel of growth, development and love. The greatest innovations came from the homes of compassionate yet driven individuals. Social activists were once young readers challenged by authority too. You are not alone, your fight isn’t just yours alone.
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…what if? Maybe I have a type or maybe it’s just my luck. My past relationships started with the boys convincing me there was a chance for “us”, until I was totally sucked in and in love. That’s when things started to change. Turns out, once you’re over this “challenge” phase of any relationship, you…
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Here’s to my best people — at home and away — you encourage me to be a better version of myself everyday. You encourage me to wake up and love life. You teach me unconditional love. You show me what means to be family. You show me the meaning of true friendship. You lead me to the light.
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